Family is something you create, it is not created for you!

I was thinking today about family, specifically my family, probably due to the birth of the newest addition to the Woodward family and I came to realize that I am truly blessed by the family I have! I also realized that the people I truly consider family, others may not see as being part of my family, and in some cases there are people that others may say are part of my family, but I do not consider them to be so (but we will not get into this). So I decided to write this blog post to pay tribute to those who I lovingly call "my family"...

1. My hubby...though we are not family by blood, because that would be WRONG!, there is no doubt that Philip is the MOST IMPORTANT person in my family! I would not be who I am as a person if not for him and I rely on him more than anyone else in my family.

2. My kids...again they are not genetically related to me but they are just as much mine as if they were created from my genetic material! Just as any mother would, I would give my life for their's in a heartbeat and I truly believe that most of who they are today and will be tomorrow is related to who I am (though I will never discount the importance of their birthmothers in

giving them life).

3. My parents...obviously the two people I call mom and dad are and always will be two of the most important people in my life! Though I often butt-heads with my mom, she is also one of the people I talk to and visit the most and one of the five people I call when ever I need to talk about something (which is often!). My dad: while we have had some real rough patches in our relationship, I LOVE the man he is today and could not think of a better grandfather for my kids!

BUT also included in the "parents" category are Philip's parents because I have learned from them too in the just over 10 years that I have known them and I am equally happy that

my kids have them as grandparents, particularly Phil's father who is the BIGGEST, SWEETEST man I have ever known and who I know played a BIG role in teaching my hubby to be the wonderful man he is today.

4. My siblings...this group not only includes my three wonderful siblings (Lara, Hans, and Jake) who I grew up with, but also my two brothers and sister (Stephen, Andrew, and Merenda) whom I have gained through marriage and my children's godparents (Kati & Mike) who started out as simply neighbors but have become some of the most important people in my and my kids' lives.

While I do not talk with my bio sibs as much as I would like, I am so proud of the adults they have become and the aunt and uncles they are because they truly show my kids that you can be and achieve anything you want.

As for my "in-law" sibs eventhough they only live about a 2 hour drive away, I still do not see them nearly enough! While S&A were not raised with me, they truly are my brothers in every way...they would protect me if I needed it, they poke fun at me when I need it, and they kept my husband in line growing up with the occasional beat down which helped make him who he is today...and they would still do it if I asked them to ;) My sister, Murtie, who is a NEW mommy YEAH! is also one of the few people I call when I need advice or just someone to listen. Though we may be very different in many ways, we truly are sisters in every sense of the word!

Kati and Mike I have no doubt were sent by God across the US from WA into our old neighborhood in Raleigh to be the family who live in the same town as us that Philip and I did not have! They are two of the most loving people ever and really remind me of Philip and I in so many ways! Kati is the first person I call when a medical crisis happens...she is a nurse, and no two people have been through more of the ups and downs of our life since 2006 than them!

5. LAST BUT NOT LEAST...MY NEW NEPHEW!!!! While I am completely new to the "aunt" role, I have no doubt that little Leo will have a major role in my life from now on and I truly hope to have a big role in his life! Growing up I did not get to spend as much time with many of my aunts and uncles and cousins as I would have liked and I am going to make sure this does not happen to my nephew! W

hile I am not sure what our relationship will be like I hope he sees me as someone who believes in him 100%, someone who loves him unconditionally, and someone who will take care of him like he was my own son when his parents need some child-free time.

Of course there are many aunts and uncles and other family members by birth/marriage/destiny that are important to me, and I will always be thankful for the time I got to spend with those who were grandparents to me...but these people mentioned above are the most important people in my daily life and that is why THEY ARE MY FAMILY!!!

My almost 5 year old tryin to figure out the world...

Lately nothing gives me more joy than watching my little girl try to figure out the world and everything about it! While she already knows soooo much more than I did at age 5, lately she seems truly curious and eager to learn so much more. She asks some really interesting questions of me and pretty much anyone because she has her daddy's outgoing personality and lack of fear about looking stupid asking for answers (both of which I am so grateful for because I tend to remain in the dark afraid to ask for clarification if I am unclear on something). Of course at times this quest for knowledge can get exhausting as I cannot use a new word without defining it, and it can be embarrassing when she asks a stranger a personal question but since she is so cute and curious most of the time they don't mind.

Ok now that I have stated my thoughts on the matter, to truly understand why she amazes me (and cracks me up) here are some examples:

1.Yesterday, as many of you know, I became and aunt and Bella's only first cousin so far was born! As a result of her being adopted and so many ladies in our life being pregnant, we have had many conversations about babies growing in tummies, etc. But yesterday when I showed her a picture of her new cousin her first question was, "mommy how did Aunt Murtie get baby Leo out of her tummy?" I told her that a special person called a midwife helped Aunt Merenda get the baby out....knowing how she thinks I was careful not to say "push the baby out" because I really did not want the follow-up question of where she pushed him out! Lucky for me she took that explanation as enough info and moved on. Then this morning she came downstairs when she woke up with her PJs clearly stuffed with a lot of something...she walked up to me and said she was going to have some babies and I needed to be her "midwife" and help her get them out. So I pulled up her shirt slightly and pulled out three stuffed animals. She thanked me and immediately began "breast feeding her babies" because the picture I had shown her of her cousin minutes after his birth was one of him eating for the first time, though it was barely noticeable in the picture, but apparently she picked up on it!

2.The other day we got together with some friends at a park who have a son with special needs. The little boy, Davis, uses an electric wheelchair and has some speech difficulties and limited use of his hands and legs due to cerebral palsy. Although we have always tried to teach Bella to be very accepting, I was not sure if she would really play with a child who was so much more developmentally different than herself, but I had no reason to worry. Watching her interact with Davis made me so proud! Not only did she include him, but she sought help to make sure he could do what she was, such as asking his dad to help get him on the slide so they could slide together. She also asked him many questions about himself, just as she does every child she meets, and though she may not have understood what he was saying but she continued to talk to him. When she did not understand his answers she did not make him feel bad but simply asked if his mom could help her understand. One question she asked was why his hands were kind of balled up and turned in. His mother told her that that was the way God has made him. To that Bella replied "oh, ok." and then went on to talk about all the ways God had made our family members different including Phil's hearing loss and my heart problems/inability to have a baby in my tummy, and her being Spanish and adopted...all very matter of fact and proud of each of our differences.

I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea. I know some of you may say "so what?" but I just had to share because though there have been many times I have questioned my abilities as a mother. However watching Bella grow up into the curious, understanding, smart, and wonderful child she is make me so proud and know I am doing something right...but now I am so curious to see what else she will do as her understanding of the world grows as she enters Kindergarten in the Fall!